Yeah, we need to get a mod to transfer the back injury convo posts to a separate thread in the Lounge where Off-Topic goes. I don't have powers here or it would have been done already.
Same here, my surgeries so far were working on the L4-5 and L5-S1 too. They need worked on again, the arthritis is set in bad there now, the scare tissue needs removed now too. Not sure which #'s they are, but there is 3 that need worked on at the Thorasic level aka middle of the back, and at least 2 at the cervical level aka neck where they'll go thru my throat or the front of my neck and get those removed and noway out of a fusion at the cervical level since the ones above and below the 2 that must come out are marginal so fusion has to be done to hopefully save those 2 instead of making 4 bad. And 3 at the Thorasic level, you're never given a choice on a fusion at 3 in a row, 2 they don't like to and don't recommend it wo a fusion and 1 you can get by without a fusion, but all my trash disks are in multiples and degeneration is progressing faster than expected from when I was 30, and now MRI's at age 39, and 43yo show the progression from age 30 to 39 to 43, and now I'm 46,.
For now, I just eat pills like candy waiting for finances to get right, or get on disability so I can have the surgeries and hope be better. It really sucks, cuz without a college education, no wuss jobs to be had, and now with drug screening, the minute employers see the narcotics and ask questions, that's that. I get the, "We're so sorry but...." So I drive a tow truck. Go figure. For a mom and pop place that don't give a rats ass so long as I don't wreck anything and I don't. Been taking the drugs so long now, they don't affect me like they would a normal person. The things I'm thankful for, with meds, I can put on a pretty good fake and noone would know how bad I'm jacked up. Yeah, it hurts like hell to do my job, climbing in and out of a truck, getting down on hands and knees to hook chains, and especially in cold and/or wet weather. But I use a different technique. I don't bend over, I got down on a knee instead, or lay flat on my back and reach under the car. I do just about everything I want, just not for very long, and being very cautious. I also have another part time job making peanuts, but I tolerate and do it so I can have affordable group medical benefits. By the time the insurance premium comes out of that check it's $48 for 2 weeks. And I tolerate their shit cuz I have to have the insurance. And if you have a gap in coverage, then there is a 6 month pre existing condition clause, so I'm stuck there hardcore and they know they got me by the balls.
On the other hand, people don't realize the emotional toll it takes. You feel like a worthless fuggin gimp, you hurt all the time, you stay broke cuz what little money you can earn goes to pay insurance premiums that you must have, then copays on visits and medications. My house payments stays 1-2 months behind, haven't had a fuggin Christmas worth a shit in years and that's just the way it is. I've never collected welfare, never drawn a food stamp and been fighting this shit for over 16 years. It pretty much had a big hand in ending my marriage too 8 years ago. I'd be lying if there aren't times that come when weird thoughts go my thru my head. But you damn sure don't tell your Dr's or family that because then they want to take your guns away and send the damn cops over to take your guns. Yes, it happened before and I had to have a fuggin physch evaluation to get them back and that was over nothing more than a comment I made out of being pist off and didn't actually mean. So along with all the other issues, you have people controlling you telling you what you can have and can't have. One thing for certain though, just to prove all those fuggers wrong, anything like that happens, I won't be using no damn firearm. Luckily those thoughts don't happen often. And I stay positive about it because I know there are many more people out there that have it much worse than I do. Many are fighting cancer, and lose everything they own and their dignity, just to keep their life, and can't do a damn thing about it, and nothing for recreation. There are people out there missing limbs etc etc. Soldiers coming home blown to pieces, blind, deaf and crippled for life with very little help from the gubment and much younger than I am. On and on. So I don't have it as bad as many people and that's what keeps me going. I don't date or look for a wife anymore because I don't want my problems becoming someone elses problems. I've got 2 dogs that are my bestest buddies, and a ton of friends that live in my computer, that I visit with daily, :rofl: so that's life. It goes on. I just wish to hell I had the funds to do more with my guns and trucks.
